How to heal your broken heart

Heal Your Broken Heart Yourself

Ways_to_Heal_A_Broken_HeartHeartbreak will not kill you, but it does hurt, especially in the beginning when you actually do not even realize what it is even about. You will be torn by conflicting emotions: the longing for the love of your life (only his name makes you burst out sobbing), hoping – against all odds – it will all come back together, and alternating anger and fear because you see your future suddenly collapse and then add self-pity (why should this happen, what’s wrong with me?).


If your heart was truly broken andyou did what you wanted to do, you would lie in bed and never get up. The first few days after a breakup may be beneficial, however, although you have to handle the shock he’s given you. Let your emotions go, cry until you have no more tears left, call your mother, sister or best friend. Go to the spa and get pampered. This will speed up the grieving process and make you feel better overall.


Be strong and do not call him

Reconciliation efforts are meaningless if what he’s done is unforgivable. Do not go along with him and his parents to a movie or dinner, do not even look at him. Do not speak to his friends and colleagues. Avoid wherever he may hang out like his home street or the gym where he works out. Especially do not try to find out what he is doing, lest you find he’s with another which will break your heart even more. Only time will heal a broken heart.
During the healing process, tedious questions, especially after a few days, will intrude on you. You look to blame yourself for losing your great love and ask yourself if you had responded differently in some situations, would it have changed the outcome?

In hindsight reasoning makes no sense.

Invest your energy in a different direction, namely try to accept that it is over and work on the future.


Do not idealize your relationship.

Of course if you are in this sad situation, you tend to imagine that everything was better than it was in reality. Ideally you would swallow the tears and keep the sweetest memories that you share together. But be realistic: there had to be a legitimate reason you separated. Was your relationship so ideal? Were you guys destined for each other? Did your relationship actually have a future?


Find the advantages of being single again.

Do the things you have always wanted to do, but did not do because of him. Do you love hiking, but he didn’t, so you wouldn’t go? Do you like romantic movies, but he wanted to watch action movies? Find your friends, put on that short skirt that he detested and think how nice it is that you can come home whenever you want now. You probably do not know at this time, but being single has its perks.


Love yourself.

Being rejected is not fun. Your ego has a big dent in it now. You are going to need to rebuild, maybe from the ground up. Remember the girlfriends and other people who care about you, even if you have been neglecting them since you were in a relationship. If they are true friends they will always be there for you, through thick and through thin. Do not drown in self-pity, but believe in yourself to be strong. Go on vacation alone or sign up for a course you’ve wanted to take. Once you see that you can do things without him you will regain your confidence. If you are experiencing extreme emotions, a psychologist or therapist may be able to help you; do not be shy to turn to professionals. You will be better for it in the long run, and sometimes you simply need somebody to speak to.


After some time there will be days when you see a ray of sunshine again.

If you’re over the worst shock and you know that the relationship is over for good, then it is time to get back among people. Your friends will have undoubtedly asked for an afternoon to go shopping, or to see a movie or get a drink. You should accept these invitations even if you don’t feel like doing so. You will feel better for it afterwards.


Do not dwell.

This is the time to create order in your life and to change other situations where you actually are not happy.


Do not let your appearance go.

Thoughts like “I don’t need to shave this week” or “I am going to eat junk all this week just because I want to”, are unacceptable. Pay attention to your appearance because you never know what may happen, plus you will feel better about yourself and have more confidence in any social situations.


Never say that you will not date again.

Do not let a sad experience harden you or turn you into a cynic. Give yourself time to get over the old relationship but after a while it is time to move on and start to date again. Do not compare new men to old men and do not try to change anybody but yourself for the better. You never know when you meet your prince, and it is at that moment that you may realize your ex-boyfriend was just a frog.

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